Sextortion is one of the fastest-growing online threats facing children and teens today. It often happens quietly, behind screens, and many families don’t realize what’s going on until the emotional damage is already deep. Understanding how sextortion works, what signs to look for, and how to respond can make a life-changing difference for a child.
At CyberSafely Foundation, we believe that awareness, education, and connection are the strongest tools families have to keep kids safe.
What Sextortion Is :In Simple Language
Sextortion happens when someone tricks, pressures, or manipulates a child or teen into sending a private photo or video, and then threatens them to get more images, money, or silence. The threat might be: “If you don’t do what I say, I’ll send this to your friends or family.”
Unlike bullying, sextortion often starts with what feels like a friendship, flirtation, or supportive connection. The person behind the screen may pretend to be another teen, gain trust slowly, and then shift into control and fear.
How Teens Get Trapped Into Sending Photos or Videos
Most teens don’t send images because they’re careless, they send them because they’re manipulated. A predator may use attention, compliments, emotional bonding, or fake affection to make a child feel special and understood. Once trust is built, the request for a photo feels small and safe.
After that first image is sent, the power dynamic changes. What started as “connection” becomes control. The teen may feel trapped, ashamed, and terrified of what will happen if they don’t comply. This is why sextortion escalates quickly and silently.
Emotional Red Flags: Fear, Withdrawal, and Secrecy
Children rarely come out and say, “I’m being sextorted.” Instead, they show emotional and behavioral changes. Parents may notice their child becoming withdrawn, anxious, or unusually secretive about their phone. They may avoid family time, stop engaging in activities they once loved, or appear constantly stressed.
Other signs can include sudden mood swings, trouble sleeping, panic about notifications, or refusing to go to school. These aren’t just “teen moods”, they can be signals that something serious is happening online.
What NOT to Do If It Happens
When a parent discovers sextortion, the first instinct is often to panic, punish, or take the phone away immediately. While understandable, these reactions can make a child feel blamed and alone, exactly what predators rely on.
Avoid shaming, yelling, or demanding answers. Don’t threaten to remove all technology forever. Your child needs to know you are their safe place, not another source of fear. The goal is to stop the harm, not silence the child.
First Response Steps for Families
The most important first step is to listen calmly and believe your child. Thank them for telling you, that alone takes courage. Reassure them that this is not their fault and that they are not in trouble.
Next, help them preserve evidence by saving messages, usernames, and images without engaging further with the person. Report the account to the platform and, when appropriate, to local authorities or a cyber tip line. You don’t have to handle this alone, there are systems and professionals who can help.
Most importantly, stay emotionally connected. Healing doesn’t just come from stopping the threat, it comes from restoring a child’s sense of safety and trust.
Final Thought
Sextortion thrives in silence and fear. It loses power when children feel supported, believed, and protected.
At CyberSafely Foundation, our mission is to empower families with the knowledge and tools to face these challenges together. When parents stay informed and kids know they can talk, the digital world becomes a safer place,not because risks disappear, but because connection grows stronger than fear.
💙 You are not alone. And neither is your child.